Saturday, April 30, 2011

A Place and a TIme

I'm a a point in my life that I'd like to call the proverbial "Crossroads" or "Place that I've been avoiding since I started making real decisions in my life." I see years of loose ends slowly being tied up. Each one a little more day by day. But the tying of loose ends is not what makes me uneasy anymore. Its the unknown ahead. The part where new ties begin and the starting over happens.

Its spring now. I'm sitting on my beautiful balcony in my Ohio State chair (don't judge me), listening to the birds talk across the back yard, the breeze rustling the leaves and my Pandora radio playing a beautiful piano melody. If you close your eyes, its feel like your taken back to a scene from Pocahontas. 

This is quite exhilarating actually. Give me a minute, I'm going to close my eyes and go there real quick.....

[2 minutes later]

Wow! I need to do that more often! I recommend it everyone! Go out on your porch, put on some melodic tune without words and close your eyes and just listen. Its YOGA of the MIND!

Myleene Class was playing "For The Love of A Princess". It kind of reminded me of "Colors of the Wind", and like Meeko is famous for an uproar, the beauty of my moment was awakened by the slamming of sliding door across way. 

Where did the society of peace go? Perhaps peace has always meant something different. I came home from my Mary Kay Muffins & Makeovers today. I plopped down on my bed for a moment of peace and within minutes, I hear a loud knocking and my name being yelled up my stairs. I ignore her at first, but then give in. 

I always regret the moments I resist dear Deloris. I love her. But I'm selfish and don't make time to visit like I should anymore. The time I spend with her are the instances I see the meaning of peace change. 

Initially, peace was laying across my bed and refusing to acknowledge my thoughts, but then it transitioned into sitting in my living room and hearing stories of my lovely neighbor's childhood, accomplishments, and just silly stories she doesn't get to share anymore. 

When she leaves I feel refreshed and ashamed I've let so much time go since I've last just sat and had a conversation with her. She even told me how wonderful my whole family was and yet I never asked about hers.

I think this is the part where loose ends are being tied and new one starting. I'm seeing what I never saw before. I'm caring about what I never cared before. I'm taking moments to actually stop and breathe and trying my darnedest to love every single minute of it.

Even the minutes it hurts.


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